• Lost_My_Mind@lemmy.world
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    22 hours ago

    I used to see my cat do this. She’d look at me, as if to ask permission to hunt the bug. And I’d always say in a playful voice “Git dat bug! Get em! Didja get em??? Get dat bug!”

    Which I’m glad she always “asked”, because one time a bee flew in. And she gave her little look and meow that said “get him?” And I was like “NOOOOOOOO!!!” and grabbed her collar. Then I said “Thats Frank. We don’t get Frank. We open the window, and let Frank go, because he’s good for the environment! Also he will stab you.”

    And then my cat said “Wow! You sure do make a lot of friends when you leave the house every day for roughly 10 hours, AND NEVER INVITE ME OR BRING ME!!! Then sometimes you come home smelling like other cats? You think I don’t notice? Yeah I just don’t say anything! But now you’re bringing psychopaths into my home??? No no no sir! This has gone too far! You got some explaining to do mister!!!”

    And then Frank said “Excuse me, fine lady and sir. I seem to have gotten seperated from my colony and daily life of having sex with flowers. Could you by chance help me by opening this window a tad? I would be most gracious!”

    So then my cat said “I thought you said he was a stabber?”

    And Frank said “Only in self defense, fair lady! For I am but a humble bumble bee. I make honey with my bisexual bee bois. We have a whole nest just out past yonder.”

    And then the duck said “Quack quack!”

    And I said “When did we get a duck?”

    • MightyLordJason@lemmy.worldOP
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      22 hours ago

      I tried to read your comment to my cat, but I only got a couple paragraphs in when he lifted his head and said, “Excuse me, I’m napping here. Please quiet down.” I’ll try again later