I noticed myself that recently I started to somewhat prefer (trans) women with penises. Not to a degree where I cannot get off to women with vaginas, and in fact I still like both kind of genitalia, and otherwise personality and other stuff is still way more important for me in a relationship (or would be if it wasn’t so unreachable for me at the moment). I also have an “unhealthy” obsession with anal sex, on both ends, but since almost everyone has a butt and I mostly use toys, I don’t really see the lack of a penis a great disadvantage on that front (also I’m a bit of a size queen myself), and also know from many of my trans friends that most trans women don’t really like to be the penetrating one.
As a non-passing transfem with some kink experience via a few long-term partners (quality over quantity) I’m not offended by the existence of chasers or being fetishized in an authentic way. You seem like a decent person, as long as you aren’t one of those who pretend to be straight. You are correct in assuming that transfems usually don’t top, and in some cases the hormones make it difficult or impossible.
I guess my question is why you need transfem-specific dating advice when there’s a good number of us in the gay community and bouncing around different apps.