Key features
Its a massive house
Its not that bad really!
Huge potential
No forward chain
Description
I am probably going to get sacked when the owner reads my description…but in the meantime we are running with it! Yes its a right dump, but its a large dump. And actually look a little closer and its not as bad as it may seem. There are number of replacement windows, has a modern fuse box and the roof looks good with lead flashing around the firewalls and chimney. And its big, offering a large sitting room, dining room, kitchen, conservatory, three bedrooms and an upstairs bathroom. The garden is pretty decent too. This is your chance to save Santa and bag yourself a bargain too! Offered for sale with no forward chain.
lmao I can’t believe that line is actually in the description :D
It definitely needs work but it’s not that bad.
A 1200sqft 3/1 is considered large? I guess I don’t know UK standards.
Also, what do they mean by “no forward chain”? Is that like a monthly HOA fee?
It means the sellers are not buying a house using the proceeds from this sale. Usually means the sale will be quicker.
Sounds like “no contingencies” in the US
Not quite the same thing I think.
My understanding of “no contingency” is more to do with inspections, certifications etc. I.e. an offer has been made that isn’t going to be cancelled if the structural survey comes back with a load of issues to fix.
“Chains” in UK real estate lingo are about whether your sale is tied to other sales. For example, if you’re buying a house from an owner-occupier who won’t move out (and give you your new house) until the new house that they’re buying is ready- that’s an onward chain. A chain in the other direction would be someone who says that they’ll buy a house, but will only have the money to make the purchase once they’ve got a sale locked in for their current house. Selling a house with “no onward chain” is telling the buyer that they can have it as soon as they’ve got the money, and that the seller isn’t waiting for anything.
Chains can get very messy and complicated, as you can end up with s dozen house sales all tied up with each other waiting for one house in the chain to be ready to go before any of the others can go.
You’re talking about buyer contingencies.
This is basically “No seller contingencies “ in US lingo.
All relative, in a city (albeit not that desirable) the housing stock will be smaller so I suspect the agent means relative to other houses.
Our dump is a very, very, very large dump
With fountains on the wall
Santa used to be so warm
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That price is insane considering how much work needs to be done to make it livable
…and that you’d have to live in Portsmouth :)
😱
I wonder how it smells… and maybe how many died there…
Seeing the photos, and having been around way too many deceased estate properties, I can instantly smell the whole place.
Damp, old plaster, manky carpets, and the bathroom that smells faintly of old wee and Imperial Leather.
Give it the benefit of the doubt, it survived the great war!
There are number of replacement windows
“1 is a number”
In all seriousness though I don’t think it’s fair to blame the estate agent for being terrible, guy is doing the best he can after getting handed a shit sandwich, but still being upfront about the condition.
How bout that picture #3 tho
Free sex doll, lightly used.
One bathroom for three bedrooms. That would never work for me. We’d have a school yard returning from recess line every morning for poop and shower time.
Poop and shower? Waffle stomp?
Eww yucky. I hope not.
Is that a pink tub? Gotta restore that! I just got through restoring the pink tub in our old house and it’s got so much character!
I couldn’t live with that bathroom, it’ll have to go
The bathroom in my first house had a full avocado suite (bath, sink, toilet and medicine cabinet) with a neon green shag pile carpet.
I would have suffered with the fixtures, but that carpet would have been ripped up as soon as I found a deal on some decent tiles that don’t clash with the fixtures.
I got rid as soon as I had the money because I wanted a shower. Something that wasn’t present as it was rare in houses here in the UK until at least the early '90s.
I recently went to a viewing of a place with a bathroom in that style. Interestingly, the owner had decided he needed a shower cabinet in addition to the bathtub/shower combo in the bathroom, but as there was no more room in there he/she placed the shower cabinet in the bedroom, next to the bed. On shag pile carpet. There was mold everywhere, and the carpet in the bedroom kinda looked like something that had been used as a rag in a machine workshop for a decade or two.
The tankless water heater located in the shower is the best.
That’s a lot of water damage
Not sure I buy that the roof is okay, with that peeling ceiling. I guess a tub or toilet could be above it.
$750k in Seattle area for worse
