Ininewcrow

“Like a blind man at an orgy … I was going to have to feel my way through” - Frank Drebin

… he whispered to himself, standing on the New England coast, his long hair blowing in the wind, shirtless in his strong muscular frame as he watched the ocean recede and drive her watery passions out to the European shore.

The massive outflow of fluidic carnal energy temporarily disturbed the ocean swells and sent a tsunami of sweet scented passion that hit the Portuguese coast later that morning.

The sad part is that I’ve seen old friends do this to each other for decades … then got terribly sad at the funeral of the first friend that died.

Now I’m realizing I’m doing the same thing

:(

This reminds me of one of my favourite memories this time of year - walking the streets of Lisbon, Portugal with my wife. We didn’t have much money (we never did) but it was always fun to travel to new places in the world and to explore it as much as we could. It was December, cold, wet, miserable which is why we were there … it’s the cheapest time of year to travel because no one wants to go somewhere where the weather is not so great. But on those cold walks at night, they have street vendors selling roasted chestnuts … we couldn’t believe it. We had only read about stuff like that and it was the most cozy feeling to huddle in the drafty cold while eating a warm handful of freshly roasted chestnuts next to the hot fire of the cart.

It’s not hard … you just turn the monitor upside down and you can translate everything.

I remember reading once that world wide, all the ants on the planet weigh collectively more than all the elephants put together on the planet.

I’ve got a mechanical device that will shake the ants out … I’ll just crank it up to 10,000 rpm so I can get my ants fast and be on my way … let me just adjust the carburetor so I pull start the engine to get started … HOLD STILL!!!

Hi! … (then awkwardly standing by for the next two hours as the snail slowly moves away)

I love VPNs for this … I get to see advertising from around the world … Japanese noodles, Nordic furniture, some weird German food, Turkish real estate, Australian drinks … and all of it delivered in languages I don’t understand.

Which I understand and appreciate … any other time of year or maybe on birthdays, I’ll take a bit of time to try to remember what the person likes and what gift they might enjoy. Usually, we’ll be doing something and the person will mention something like ‘I like that’, ‘I wish I had that’ or something … then it’s easy to just buy the thing and gift them that shortly after.

But during Christmas, it’s really hard to try to figure out what a bunch of different people like or not like … it usually ends up that you’ll mess up on most people and get it right with a few. Which is why I settled on just cash.

Same here … if I’m gifting to someone under the age of about 8 years old, I’ll them a little toy and some cash … anyone older than that is just getting straight cash.

I’m not spending time to try to figure out what people like or dislike or whether or not they’re following some latest trend … take my cash and do what you want with it … and for teens, they combine all the cash they get and get one big thing they want which works out best for them.

Some of the best food we can have is the food we make for ourselves.

It never feels like it at the time … but whenever I’ve gone far from home, I always miss the food me and my wife make.

When an authoritarian country does it, everyone goes crazy

When a company does it to make more money and take more control, it’s just business as usual.

I’m lost in a fog … but I know there’s a steep cliff ledge nearby where I’ll fall for a very, very long time.

They’re on their way to the spiral of death