People tell me I’m hilarious all. the. time. Wish I was actually that happy.

Broke: the Apocalypse is coming

Woke: the Apocalypse has come and gone and come and gone numerous times and in each occurrence replaced our comfortingly benign world with something new and terrifyingly incomprehensible. The crystal temples of revelation have been both built and felled and will be built again, and the many marks of the beast have worked their way into our lives bit by bit as ID numbers and credit cards and smartphones and so neatly that few people will object when he comes time to implant them. The only certainty is that each successive apocalypse and the world that comes after will be be unthinkably more bizarre than the last.

Meet people: hobby or spiritual community are the two big ones most people meet a partner at. Look up cheap hobbies in particular something like a walking club.

Cheap places to take a girl:

• fish around in conversations for her favorite food. Pick the prettiest spot within walking distance. Pick somewhere out of the way but visible to passerby like the edge of a park. Check the calendar for favorable weather. Bring a blanket, that favorite food, and anything needed to make the environment comfy like an umbrella.

• if it’s just not the time of year for favorable weather book a library or community center presentation room and in addition to food fish around in convos for a favorite movie. Still bring a large blanket and push the tables and wheely chairs out of the way.

Any partner who finds effort over cash undesirable is just not a good fit for your life right now.

factual true opinions

oh god that’s it; you’re an utterly insufferable person. And learning how to constructively approach injustice by conserving and directing your energy towards actions that will make the most real difference is a core goal of the therapy. Either put in the effort to become someone people want to be around or accept people don’t want to be around you.

No one is making you be here. You can click a button and start your own community or even spin up your own server and if your modding policies are that much better people will switch. …or none or very few of the users like what you say and the mod just happens to be the one responsible for telling you.

Is it frustrating to be part of the outgroup? Sure. Is it frustrating to have an opinion people dislike or don’t think is worth leaving their ingroup for? Sure. But that’s just called being a weirdo. Lots of people are weirdos. I’m a weirdo. In fact it’s often hard for me to get certain things done or find certain products. Bigelow doesn’t stock my favorite flavor in most stores because it’s not popular enough. That’s not oppression that’s just being unpopular.

Being a weirdo isn’t for the faint of heart. Dialectal behavior therapy changed my life and teaches four ways to approach a problem. 1. Stop seeing it as a problem. 2. Fix the problem (conform). 3. Accept the problem. 4. Stay whiny. I tend to vacillate between 1 and 3 (sigh sadly and order my tea online) but I spend little time engaging in #4 (bitching online about how it’s other people’s fault).

I’m not even going to look into your specific ideology. With people who say these things I often regret finding out.

This is what I’m saying! Maybe it’s like that game from rick and Morty. 1% chance you get a brain tumor, 1% chance you just get put in the wrong body in some way or other cuz fuck you that’s why.

It’s not the age gap it’s the raising her / being her caretaker as a small child and having all those surrogate father-daughter moments. Switching suddenly from father-daughter to love interest… 😬

How do you know you didn’t and you just happened to guess wrong? Like you were like oh “seems cool” then your neurons grew in mismatched.

No it’s because he’s too cheap to even hire a catering company and his first lady or first daughter or whoever isn’t even up to faking the whole party hostess part of that role by hiring an event planner to do it for her.

There is but you gotta think on your feet as it were and even then you don’t always succeed. When I was last hospitalized I knew my silicone laces were psych safe but I didn’t bother trying to explain it to the employee; I just asked if they could take them out. They poked at them for a few seconds before realizing and I got to wear my own shoes for the rest of my stay. You gotta give people juuust enough info to sneak the realization in there and it’s a suuuper hard (and moving) target to hit.

Yeah I’m worried about them

a) creating botnets that simulate grassroots political movements

b) as this user said, the joke about everybody having their own government agent was absurd because that level of attention given to an individuals activity was impossible. That’s about to be a lot less impossible.

My tablet doesn’t support it I was so confused. I got a work laptop that I literally only use for teaching but I use it’s charger at home for everything that thing is a BEAST.

Well that also happens to me though.

Admittedly a lot of people think “voluntary” makes this a customer service situation where I’m not allowed to do that when the reality is that I just have to call somebody afterward to decide whether we’re changing their status to involuntary or kicking them out and calling the cops.

In that exact moment where I judge a threat to self or others I’m 100% allowed to use my judgment to neutralize the threat provided I a) maintain their hemodynamic stability and b) only do what is precisely necessary to neutralize that threat. Now that exact risk assessment doesn’t have as much formal training behind it as I think it should but it’s also usually at least partially a team decision and if the assigned nurse is newish there’s usually at least one nurse involved who has a decade plus experience (unfortunately these days that’s usually me). But like I said, there’s always a list of things I’m not allowed to do, but once significant threats of or actual violence happens, that list gets very short very quickly.

A lot of people think there’s this secret third option where they’re just allowed to buck up at my techs and throw things at them and that is just 0% ever a thing. I’ll let them get one incidence of bucking up at me or throwing something small at me like a small paperback just so I can truthfully document that I tried to go the least restrictive route, but I never ask my subordinates to take on that risk since they don’t have as many options to escape or get the situation back under control.

As an aside, I work inpatient psychiatry where it’s not so much that they’re always right as much as that it’s pointless and even counterproductive to argue. In those situations you don’t say “but this is a-” you say “I really wanna talk over the details of how to get you exactly what you want” then try to elicit the details of (to use this example) what they think a macchiato is.

Now, the reason I prefer working inpatient psychiatry as opposed to costumer service is that when they start yelling I get to say “oh, my apologies. I’ll come back when you’re more ready to talk about this!” and just leave. And then if they follow me to keep yelling…

The list of things I’m not allowed to do will always be longer than the list of things the waiter is legally not allowed to do. The waiter can legally just fight back, and I’m never allowed to do that. But the second they become significantly verbally threatening or physically threatening in any way, the list of things I’m not allowed to do to someone as part of my job suddenly becomes much shorter than the waiter’s.

Oh I would certainly think it’s the norm but I do wonder if there’s some culture somewhere that really is just that literal. Like shit we don’t know what the sentinelese (but they definitely give a dark sense of humor vibe).

I suspect it’s a more niche flavor but I’d be more surprised if they didn’t.

it wouldn’t matter as much if we didn’t expect so much of people.

• ADHD wouldn’t be this much of a problem in children if we didn’t expect them to sit still in a classroom for 8 hours as a ten year old.
• depression wouldn’t be as much of a problem if people weren’t expected to have the energy to stand in one place getting verbally abused for 8+ hours a day.

and don’t get me started on homelessness. literally just fix homelessness and about 1/2 of the healthcare system would instantly right itself even before dealing with the health insurance issue. especially the ERs.

literally just tax the fuck out of empty housing. each person is allowed to have 1 house they don’t live in (which is extremely generous). anything after that should be nearly impossible to afford taxes on. And no corporate landlords. I’m fine renting; if I take a 12 week contract in another city I’m not buying and in not staying in a hotel and I’d also rather be paying somebody who actually lives there.

except they’re the ones holding the video and no cop who wants to continue being a cop is going to investigate anyone that could actually get them in real trouble. it’s been hard enough prosecuting anyone in the Epstein files despite TONS of evidence. how many people have fallen off balconies or just never came back from the yacht party that we don’t even know about?

Oh, yeah. It’s because In our historical environment it was actually super important to be able to do that. Even now its super handy sometimes. There was one time my foot had been fully down on the break for several seconds before I consciously realized I had seen the eyes of a deer in the bushes next to the road.

It’s actually a super important concept I teach in violence deescalation classes. Our human brain has a natural capacity for risk assessment you just need to learn to evaluate it properly. My two examples are:

• patient w/ dementia is asking a repetitive question. This makes me uneasy and I’m struggling to pin down why. After a bit I realize that if I was still working with criminally insane men, repetitive questioning means he’s not liking the answer he’s getting and trouble is coming. A dementia patient genuinely doesn’t remember asking. False alarm (but never call your brain stupid, always tell it thank you and make it a hot cup of tea or whatever your equivalent is).

• patient w/ severe Psychosis has a hair trigger. One day they slammed their body into the heavy hardwood exit door hard enough to crack it away from the maglock. About a week later I’m walking past them standing in the hall and my brain just started screaming at me that I needed to do something right that second so I went and pulled an ativan and offered it, which they were suspicious of but took. I was going to document that the patient looked tense, which was enough with how rapid their escalation pattern was, but when I sat down to document I also realized, they were staring at the door. If I’d waited a few minutes later they probably would have been doing something very dangerous and I would’ve had to do an injection and a physical hold which is so much more stressful and less safe for both them and us.

TLDR; there’s also a book called “The Gift of Fear.” Anxiety is not your enemy, but you do need to learn to ask it,“Why?” and you need to learn how to address your brain’s concerns in a way that’s safe and intelligent. And on a public scale there’s a LOT of people who will try to take advantage of your anxiety and you need to evaluate their motives very carefully.