Its meant in the sense: better build communities in the fediverse rather than on Mars. Its a pun on “Colonize Mars”

Yeah, probably. So you like the story in general its just too much going on?

Ok, I wrote most of it myself, for parts 2-5 I used some generated stuff as well. I think its fine to use AI as help for inspiration and to get a start. But the first part (Spring) I wrote completely myself. Its actually a few years old by now.

Its fine. Honest feedback is always good. Have to see what I can do about the format

I’ll be honest, I only made it halfway into the first paragraph. Such as they are, the thin paragraphs coupled with multiple-screens-no-formatting length makes it impossible to follow the text

That’s unfortunate. I will try to fix it. The WriteFreely-Server I used keeps crashing so I switched to Wordpress …

plus at least from the first paragraph it reads like generated AI nonsense.

I wrote it myself :D But its fine. I hoped it would be fun to read.

Is that the point, though? As in, is this my wooooosh-moment? Is this supposed to say that the Fediverse is too difficult to consume and makes no sense at first?

No, it shouldn’t :( It should just be fantasy/magic realism

Thanks for the feedback.

I really enjoyed that! I think the first section was the strongest to me personally – it was more grounded in real events, while some of the other sections lost some of their power by becomming too abstract. I did enjoy the aspect of different interconnected characters setting up eachothers stories.

I totally get that. Thing is I wanted to depict some of the drama from the Fediverse in there and then you have to necessarily get a little abstract. I tried to include some of the drama happening here on Lemmy, however, its still not as exciting as I would hope it to be.

I went ahead and shared it in my solarpunk bookclub, hopefully some more people will give it a read through!

That’s great!

Also it might be worth crossposting to a solarpunk community, it really fits the vibe :)

Will do, will do