ok, so, i can masturbate some of the time. i feel in the mood to masturbate, all that. the thing is, it’s very rare and it’s only to fictional men or fantasies of hot women. i can’t really masturbate to IRL women and definitely not men.

i have a very low sex drive, i guess, and i suddenly don’t want to masturbate after a while when some other people could easily keep going for multiple “rounds”. it’s especially moreso the feeling of masturbating rather than feeling horny for any particular reason, even if the few times i do, it’s for the idea of these women or fictional men.

i could imagine having sex with my partner when i get one to try it, but i don’t actually feel sexual attraction to people when i can easily feel romantic attraction. i literally don’t get any sort of tingly feeling, nothing, when i see people.

  • MaybeALittleBitWeird@lemmynsfw.comEnglish
    10·
    25 days ago

    Like all things come concerning sexuality there are two big points to keep in mind:

    • Nobody can tell you what your feelings are about this but you. And,
    • Just like all sexuality, asexuality also exists on a spectrum. It doesn’t sound like you’re sex-repulsed at least, but that doesn’t necessarily preclude being Ace.

    Don’t worry so much about what turns you on in fantasy versus reality. That’s a pretty common experience and it’s perfectly fine to enjoy the thought of something and not be interested in the reality. Don’t worry so much about comparing your libido to others either because everyone’s different. I’m not Ace but I go through periods where I can be insatiably horny for a week and then feel little need for release for weeks myself. This will also change throughout your life as you get older and/or your life circumstances change

    My personal advice would be to not worry so much about defining your sexuality until you’ve got a better idea of what you do and don’t like. If you know you’ve got a lower libido then that’s definitely something to consider when you’re figuring out compatibility with a partner, but just because you’ve got a lower interest in sex doesn’t necessarily mean you’re Ace.

    It sounds like you’re interested in trying to have sex so I would advise to at least wait until after you’ve had the experience a few times(and maybe with a few different people) before you worry about defining your true feelings. Whatever decision that you come to though, good luck on your journey! 💜