• ghostdoggtv@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    Guilty conscience meat eaters use concern trolling to salvage their own self-esteem. In my experience, those expressions of worry are back handed compliments at best. They never come from people who are in better shape than I am and they don’t come from people with better nutrition either.

    • Krudler@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      Wow you really nailed it.

      I lost 58kg and the only things I ever heard was concern trolling from my friends that resented me for doing what they could not.

      Never heard word one about my body while I was unhealthy and unhappy, and the shitty remarks started as soon as the weight reduction became noticeable.

      “Woah slow down, don’t want you to disappear!” “You’ve proven your point! You can eat a donut!” “Why do you want to be miserable and only eat seeds?” “Fuck dude you’re vanishing! Eat a hamburger!” “You think you’re better than everyone now!” “It’s actually really unhealthy to be as lean as you’ve become.” “Don’t like hanging out anymore, you make me think about every molecule I put in my damned mouth!” “You look like a skeleton now.”

      And so forth.

      • T00l_shed@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        Wow those are shitty people. Good on you for losing that weight, as a hefty fellow it’s fucking haaaaard work and you should be proud of the effort you put in!

        • Krudler@lemmy.world
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          1 year ago

          Thanks for the support!

          I made so many changes in my journey. I taught myself to cook and made every meal from scratch ingredients… for 6 months. I’m reminiscing now thinking about how many tortillas I’ve pressed, sauces I’ve made, things I’ve fermented, and hundreds of hours on the cutting board. How many times I ordered a “kid size” pizza or sundae on my “cheat” days lol

          I ran (poorly), swam, rode, lifted and burned so many calories. I meditated every day and did monthly therapy to help with the mental stress of the physical and lifestyle changes. That is all time, effort, pain, money, and sacrifice.

          Every day without wavering I made a hundred difficult little choices that prioritized my goals vs my desires/old patterns. Food everywhere and people genuinely insulted when I wouldn’t partake with them or in their way. Watching my friends literally not enjoy their meal from their own shame, just because my serving was conspicuously smaller. Dealing with my biology compelling me to eat one way while I was consciously reprogramming myself to eat another way. Massive social pressures from all sides.

          I never really even told anybody of my goals or changes. I didn’t make it my personality or a thing. Never spoke of it once or advocated anything to my friends. Only spoke about being slimmer when specifically asked.

          That’s why it was so hurtful to undertake such tremendous responsibility for my own personal transformation, and then have people internalize it, make my journey about how them and how they feel shitty when they look at me, then make a snide or sinister comment. Only my best friend of 30 years gave me any positive feedback.

          The whole thing was kind of a rough ride. Worth it in the end, but wow it was so much more than just eating less.

          Thanks for listening. I really appreciate your comment a lot!

          • Ltcaos_ca@lemmy.ca
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            1 year ago

            Such and interesting read and I hope you found it worth it in the end…! You’ve verbalised a lot of my experiences with quitting alcohol. It was the hardest thing I’ve done and lost a lot of ‘friends’ along the way. But ended up happier, healthier, and genuinely enjoying life again.

            • Krudler@lemmy.world
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              1 year ago

              Good for you my friend! Yes it was the same thing when I quit alcohol 8 years ago! Quickly find out that people are happy for you to quit drinking until you actually do it, then it’s like … what you think you’re better than me? Come on have a drink!

          • Franzia@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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            1 year ago

            Wow this is the truth of the post. Not just that it ia demeaning that vegans get harassed but why it’s counter to the reality of the effort being made.

          • T00l_shed@lemmy.world
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            1 year ago

            Good on you, yeah you can’t downplay the fortitude required to make such life altering changes. It’s so easy to slip back into the status quo. That being said for anyone else reading, if you’ve tried, and failed, remember that you got further along than if you never tried at all. Keep at it, don’t beat yourself up, you can do it!

      • jarfil@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        Congrats on the weight loss.

        I had to stop at 40Kg because my heart meds went out of balance… and have pretty quickly gained 12Kg since.

    • FrostKing@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      I’m gonna be honest, I wanted to argue against this, but I can’t deny it. I’m part of a relatively overweight family (actually mostly because of immune system problems that thankfully I didn’t inherit) and all I get from my parents are “You’re looking skinny” or “You’re worrying too much about weight” just because I want to exercise and eat well. Even then, I’m ~20lbs over weight. To be devil’s advocate, I think part of it is that overweight people have struggled with problems of being too hard on themselves before, and so don’t want to you fall into that, but go too far the other way. The conversation of overweight/vegans doesn’t exactly overlap perfectly, but it made me think of it.

      • Bob@feddit.nl
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        1 year ago

        Animals are there to be food.

        You think animals are there for a fated reason? Like all animals have a destiny? Because your comment relies on this notion.

      • ghostdoggtv@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        virtually nobody

        The ones who felt guilty about it in this context have stopped doing it. You must have felt so smart though!

      • Gloomy@discuss.tchncs.de
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        1 year ago

        Virtually nobody who eats meat feels guilty about it

        I felt guilty about it and became a vegetarian and, once I leaned about how milk and eggs lead to death and suffering, a vegan. I have been so for 10 years plus now.

        Animals are there to be food.

        Yes, but only in the same sense that woman are there for the plesure and serving of men. It’s a social construction and is, as it thankfully has with the perception of woman, changing.

        If there was a life form that could eat me it would, and I’d have to accept that.

        I don’t think so. I think you’d ramble in about how unethical it is to eat a sentient beeing and how cruel this hypothetical lifeform is. Because that’s how we are build. It’s easiest for us to feel empathie towards our own sorry asses.

        You can learn to expand your empathie tough. Start here. Watch it completely. No skipping. Then we can talk:

        https://youtu.be/LQRAfJyEsko?si=MT8NgPIU0bpIpg3i

      • Franzia@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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        1 year ago

        We bred them to be like that tho there were wild versions of chickens. Ever seen a wild turkey? Fuuuuck. Talk about risk if you miss that things taking an eye out. Bovines were easier prey but in the wild would have been protected by bulls, I think?

      • jarfil@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        If there was a life form that could eat me it would, and I’d have to accept that.

        Ever heard of cannibalism?

      • tocopherol@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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        1 year ago

        Okay, let someone murder you and eat you if they are hungry then. I will repeat another comment, have you heard of cannibalism? Plenty of people go hungry each year, why don’t we eat each other? Or why won’t you capture and eat my dog?

      • gmtom@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        “I dont have a conscience so I assume no one else does either.”

      • DroneRights [it/its]@lemm.ee
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        1 year ago

        If there was a life form that could eat me it would

        Yeah, it’s called COVID-19. It wants to use your cell nuclei to grow its children from your body’s energy stores, and it doesn’t mind if it shuts down your respiratory system until you can’t breathe. And there are a hundred deadly diseases like it.

        Every time you wash your hands, blow your nose with a tissue, or cover your mouth to cough, you are showing you value life above the supposed right of predators to eat you. And that’s okay. Everything has a right to live and that’s okay.