Sniper report be like

Why you gotta judge?

Holy sweet baby Jesus! You need to put a trigger warning on your post. The traumatic memories that you brought to the surface are enough to send me back to therapy all over again.

Seriously. Much much worse.

First you had to pay a fortune for a device, with which you may or may not get very limited map updates. Then after that you had to pay quite a bit to update. Even then it could take a year for permanent road changes to make it to the map updates, and temporary changes were never shown. Road construction, wrecks, and temporary closures were your problem. And God forbid your route took you through a closed area because there was no way to route around it. You had to find a place to park so you could look over the tiny little map to figure out your own way around the blockage, or else you could pick a direction and then yolo your route until you were far enough away from the problem area that the gps would finally choose a route that didn’t go through the problem area.
And that’s just the tip of the iceberg. For instance, all the above assumes that it accepted the address you were going to as a valid address. There was nothing like the joy of typing in an address and having the device tell you that it doesn’t exist.

Oh look, such a clever post complaining about a shitty pessimistic new years joke in a post about how shitty the previous year was, in a sub for mediocre comics. How could I ever have been so pessimistic about the new year?

I like how optimistic you kids are these days… I mean, it’s adorable that you think 2025 could possibly be better than 2024.

Very few were funny or creative. If anything they were heavily trending away from anything funny or creative towards loud and obnoxious. They knew everyone got up to go to the bathroom or kitchen and wanted to make sure that you still heard and recognized their ad. Then with the advent of tivo type recording, they did their best to make the first and last 15 seconds as abusive as possible, that way they could force their advertising into your brain before you had a chance to grab the remote and skip it, or during that little bit of commercial you had to watch just before the show returned.
While I will admit that there were some absolutely amazing commercials, like the Trunk Monkey, those were not only incredibly rare, but also being rapidly abandoned. I think modern commercials may actually be better overall than those of the past. Just look at what Ryan Reynolds is doing. I loath commercials, but I am also subscribed to his YouTube channel and regularly watch his “videos” because they’re amusing.

It says on the package that it’s artisanal, so I think that means it’s special.

Maybe some future school shooter wannabe will notice that they barely even report on school shootings anymore, and Uvalde even reelected the piece of shit sheriff that let all those kids die. Maybe they will see this shooter being treated like some kind of hero, and decide to hunt Billionaires or CEOs instead.
After enough of those, the world will be drastically improved, or the surviving billionaires will finally bring about some real gun control legislation.