Hmm I almost get it but I’m still kind of perplexed by this attitude because you absolutely can still set boundaries, the tools to do that are there, and I think increasingly people are choosing to do that.
It’s easy enough to disconnect for a time at a personal level, but you still have the issue of friends, family, and society in general not joining you. It can be a lonely thing to disconnect by your self.
The difference is not just that you could disconnect, it’s that disconnected was the default.
I have never really struggled with this, maybe because I’m older and I don’t have many issues with anyone in my life, like, refusing to just text me with the understanding that I’ll answer when I’m not busy.
I’m well, for me, personally, I don’t install many apps anymore. I have blorp for Lemmy/piefed, but no notifications enabled, otherwise I log into websites through Mobile browsers if I’m going to use them on my phone or I use them on the desktop. Not getting push notifications makes a big difference in how intrusive I find things.
If something HAPPENS, like I get dragged into an argument on Reddit or something, or I just posted a new art work and I’m excessively worried about how it’s “doing” on Bluesky for instance, I log out completely on my phone and use browser extensions that limit my browsing to short windows on specific websites or block them entirely. When I was in college, I was using a lot of this extensions to make sure I wasn’t getting distracted from school work excessively.
I also have an ereader that makes it a lot easier to stay engrossed in a book than reading on my phone used to.
I’m American, so there’s no pressure to use Whatsapp or anything like that. My family sends regular text messages, but I do rely on Snapchat to keep in touch with a couple of people, and have notifications from strangers disabled.
Boundaries are going to be highly individual, though. There’s tools out there for just about anyone but what helps me stay connected but not TOO connected might not work for someone else. For example, someone else might find tiktok really valuable but be worried about it taking over their life (I bounced right off TT every time I used it). They should consider setting up parental controls on it. It’s all going to depend on the person. Some people might need to go dumb phone only to truly relax.
Hmm I almost get it but I’m still kind of perplexed by this attitude because you absolutely can still set boundaries, the tools to do that are there, and I think increasingly people are choosing to do that.
It’s easy enough to disconnect for a time at a personal level, but you still have the issue of friends, family, and society in general not joining you. It can be a lonely thing to disconnect by your self.
The difference is not just that you could disconnect, it’s that disconnected was the default.
Sounds like a feature, not a bug.
I have never really struggled with this, maybe because I’m older and I don’t have many issues with anyone in my life, like, refusing to just text me with the understanding that I’ll answer when I’m not busy.
You can, but to me it feels different when you’re cutting yourself off from things intentionally vs when it was just the expected default.
The difference being that back then, those boundaries were the default. Now you have to fight the platforms to establish those same boundaries.
I’ll bite. Explain setting these boundaries you’re talking about.
What boundary are you having trouble setting? The answer depends a lot on that.
What? You mentioned boundaries and I’m asking what those boundaries are…
I’m well, for me, personally, I don’t install many apps anymore. I have blorp for Lemmy/piefed, but no notifications enabled, otherwise I log into websites through Mobile browsers if I’m going to use them on my phone or I use them on the desktop. Not getting push notifications makes a big difference in how intrusive I find things.
If something HAPPENS, like I get dragged into an argument on Reddit or something, or I just posted a new art work and I’m excessively worried about how it’s “doing” on Bluesky for instance, I log out completely on my phone and use browser extensions that limit my browsing to short windows on specific websites or block them entirely. When I was in college, I was using a lot of this extensions to make sure I wasn’t getting distracted from school work excessively.
I also have an ereader that makes it a lot easier to stay engrossed in a book than reading on my phone used to.
I’m American, so there’s no pressure to use Whatsapp or anything like that. My family sends regular text messages, but I do rely on Snapchat to keep in touch with a couple of people, and have notifications from strangers disabled.
Boundaries are going to be highly individual, though. There’s tools out there for just about anyone but what helps me stay connected but not TOO connected might not work for someone else. For example, someone else might find tiktok really valuable but be worried about it taking over their life (I bounced right off TT every time I used it). They should consider setting up parental controls on it. It’s all going to depend on the person. Some people might need to go dumb phone only to truly relax.