Be interested, just a little bit, in what they’re interested in. Like, you don’t have to enjoy it, but show interest and they’ll respond a lot more than if you make that a problem they have to choose over.

I mean I might put down the doc simply because I can come back to it anytime, while the moment won’t. But what would spark things more is if she asks me something simple about what had my focus.

And this goes both ways. Paying attention to what your SO likes in any amount works so much better than making it something bad.