Is Strawberry Shortcake still a thing? If you’d have asked me to bet money I would not have guessed that anyone under the age of 40 would have recognized that character.

It wasn’t so much that there was a stigma against watching Monty Python per se. It’s that it became sort of inextricably linked with a certain type of kid who became obsessed with it, could (and frequently would) recite all the lines of the movies from memory, and would tend to be a little obnoxious about their fandom. They were usually nerdy kids who already weren’t well liked by the more popular cliques, and aggressively shouting lines from Holy Grail at people wasn’t helping matters. Like, my friends and I loved those movies, but I guess not as much as the theater kids who were galloping around the school on imaginary horses shouting, “Ni!” at people and demanding a shrubbery.

It really shouldn’t be that bad. At worst it’ll be moldy, but it’s entirely possible you’ll come back to find it just kind of shriveled and very squishy. It depends on how ripe it was when you left, and how warm and humid your apartment is. But even if it smells, it won’t be the kind of smell that hangs around for very long after you throw it out.

Of all the food you could have left out and forgot about you really lucked out with it being an avocado. If it were milk or raw fish you’d probably be coming home to something truly horrific.

Gorn.

Only way to get rid of it is to build a makeshift cannon out of some random stuff you find laying around.

At this point I can only assume that Microsoft is actively trying to punish me for using their products.

No. Not really. They’re different things. Enshittification is a term coined by Cory Doctorow to describe how previously good tech companies break their own platforms to maximize short-term profits. The AI bubble is just a regular investment bubble where people are throwing too much money at a product that can’t deliver on its own hype.

A good example of enshittification is why Google search sucks now. A while back they noticed that the number of search queries was hitting a plateau. It hit a plateau because Google controlled over 90% of the search market, there are a finite number of humans on Earth, and there’s a limit to how many things a person needs to google in a day. But Google is a publicly traded corporation and line needs to go up. So what Google did was to make their search engine worse at searching so that people would have to perform multiple searches to find what they’re looking for. More searches = more ads delivered. More ads delivered = line go up. Their flagship product doesn’t do the only thing it’s supposed to do now, but the shareholders got a bigger return on their investment that quarter.

The AI bubble is the tech industry promising a fantastic blowjob machine, and selling investors on the vision of a future of unlimited bespoke orgasms where you’ll never have to foot the bill for taking a woman on a date, or pay a prostitute, ever again. Everybody started throwing money at that because, duh, it’s a magic blowjob machine. But now that people are using it they’re finding out that, yeah, sometimes it sucks your dick, but a lot of the time it just punches you in the balls, or it hallucinates that the definition of “blowjob” is anal penetration with a leaf blower. And sometimes it randomly turns into a nine-legged spidergoat that vomits acid on your crotch, and nobody really knows why. Also, it seems to be burning through a crazy amount of energy and water just to punch me in the balls. So now people are getting less and less enthusiastic about throwing money at it. And when the market can no longer buy into the hype because of all the testicle punching, the big investors will dump their holdings while they can still do so at a profit, and the bubble will pop.

No, Walmart is kind of an outlier by having a greeter. In other places that have a “greeter” it’s usually an extra layer of security/theft prevention, or it’s a place like Costco where you need a membership to shop there. That said, it’s basically standard for an employee to seek you out and ask if you would like help finding anything fairly soon after you walk in the store. It’s generally seen as good customer service, and in larger stores it’s not uncommon to be approached by several employees asking if you’d like help finding what you’re looking for over the course of your time in the store.

American customer service culture tends to be a little extra. There’s a premium on going the extra mile that’s tied into America’s self-image of the “land of opportunity,” and the hustle culture that goes with that. But when that’s what you’re accustomed to dealing with, the customer service cultures of other countries can be kind of jarring. I know from my own travels through Europe that shopping in some countries can range from feeling cold and indifferent, to feeling actively hostile.

That said, most Americans wouldn’t think of complaining to your manager about it. It’s only a specific kind of over-entitled asshole that does that. Sounds like you had a real karen on your hands.

On the plus side, considering the average lifespan of Samsung appliances, you probably won’t have to put up with it for very long.

I couldn’t say whether one burns more fat than the other, and I don’t put much stock in the advice of random social media influencers, but I know that at least for myself putting some carbs in my stomach before I start my workout is the difference between walking out of the gym feeling great, and walking out of the gym feeling cranky and miserable. Just half a banana or a piece of toast makes a night and day difference, especially if my workout is going to last longer than 45 minutes or so. And if I feel better during and after exercise, I’ll be inclined to do it more often, and that definitely burns more fat.

Oh, it “has ties” to Tren De Aragua? Given Trump’s track record I have to assume that means they accidentally merc’d a random fishing boat from Guyana and are saying it was a Venezuelan drug boat so they can be like, “Um, it’s actually good that we murdered those people, actually.”

Ibuprofen.

Or did you think people were just like, “Well, my knees were kinda sore going up the stairs today. Guess I’ll go slash my wrists?”

I’ve seen that message a bunch of times, but only when I’ve had a VPN running.

There are huge sound effects libraries that have been continuously built up and added to since sound in movies became a thing. Foley artists dip into them constantly. If you watch enough old movies you can pick out some almost 100-year-old foley effects that still get used in modern tv and movies. A lot of the time foley artists will toss them in as a joke or reference that mostly only other foley artists are going to catch.

But yeah there are a lot of foley effects that get used a ton. I hear the exact door opening/closing sound from the old AOL instant messenger used in a movie or tv show at least a couple times a year. There’s also a specific cat noise that gets used constantly which people who played Postal 2 back in the day will recognize instantly.

Word.

Hate is probably a strong word, but I don’t really care for their music. There’s nothing technically wrong with it, they’re competent musicians, but it all feels boring and generic to me. It’s bland and inoffensive, like it was written to play over a grocery store PA at a barely liminal volume for a middle-aged housewife to absent-mindedly hum along with as she compares laundry soap.

This song by Slot. I know nothing about the band except that they’re Russian so I’ve always been a tiny bit worried I was actually listening to some anthem singing the glories of the Putin regime.

Weed whackers and weed eaters were used fairly interchangeably where I grew up in the US southwest and mountain west.

If the process and tradition of it appeals to you, then sure. You can find a cheap matcha set for under $20 (I think I saw one on Amazon a while ago for $10), so it’s not like you need to spend a ton of money to try it out.

I’m kind of lazy so I use one of those electric milk frothing whisks instead of a traditional bamboo one. But if you use that type of electric frother just be sure to use it in a vessel with high sides and a fair amount of extra room otherwise you’ll be wearing your matcha instead of drinking it.

I think that pretty much sums up the entire ethos of Silicon Valley these days.

Looking at this with adult eyes, no I don’t think you’re a jerk. It sounds like you’re trying help him see the reality of the situation before it causes him any undue emotional (or financial) suffering. It’s not, however, very hard to imagine how from his point of view he might feel like you’re being jerk, or maybe a bit hypocritical.

Is there any way you can get him playing with kids who are good enough to go pro? If he can start playing against people who genuinely have the goods, it’s probably not going to take him very long to figure out for himself whether he can keep up or not. And that way you don’t have to set yourself up as the bad guy as much, and you can play a more supportive role and be there to guide him to an alternative path once he gets sick of the other kids running circles around him. At least that’s how it worked for the couple of kids I knew growing up who were good enough at basketball or American football that they really thought they could go pro. It was playing against people who were the real deal that made them realize they didn’t have the shot they thought they did. It was pretty obvious that these other kids had something extra, and were playing on a level my friends felt they were probably never going to reach.