• 15 Posts
Joined duela 8 hilabete
Cake day: urt. 29, 2022


other people think, you can directly throw it under your shirt,

I was doing this the other day. I kept on forgetting it was in my shirt and when I stood up it fell out. Tips for this?

Off the top of my head, I can imagine a pantyhose holder scarf thing

Shouldnt it ideally have some kind of thing that lets me keep it against my body when walking? Bc in winter

Add https://beehaw.org/c/feminism to the sidebar of feminism?

@Gaywallet@beehaw.org, add lemmy.ml/c/feminism to the sidebar of beehaw feminism?

Will let subscribers flow more seemlessly to both subs

Can we do a sidebar link swap between all the science subs?
There is: https://lemmy.ml/c/science https://beehaw.org/c/science https://mander.xyz/c/science which would allow people to more easily find the other subs

Men’s liberation goal

Fellow lemmings, you doing alright for the heatwaves?
As a poor person, maybe most useful advice for other poor people is water bottles. Tap water is colder than the air so I try to keep a plastic water bottle in my hand or pressed against my skin and it helps a lot. If anyone is in a bind, post your situation and we/I will try to come up with a simple enough solution. My irl qualifications might be useful for the first time online lol: I was homeless for 2 months and have been poor af for my whole life, so i've had to ghetto innovate a lot of stuff.

Maybe i'm not using alovoa right, but a lot of their options lead to blank pages?
Like there is a alert button that leads to a blank page.

for online people that you’ve spoken to, have you not shared any other language with them, aside from toki pona?


Any blogs or content creators that you know off that share similar kinds of stories? I figure this would be another way to learn about this kind of thing.

Upright bicycle versus what? Like are the other types the tour de France racing style?

Have you ever had a conversation in real life in Toki pona?
What was the context? Was it like with a friend, or like with a stranger? Since it's so simple to learn I am thinking about learning it just as a networking activity, since it'll pop up eventually

Unfortunately many women will not be physically affectionate with men because many men misread this sign

I think it’s mostly due to societal expectation. Ex even me, for the most part, I have very little understanding of being close emotionally or physically with someone and not dating them. Like I can theorize about it, but it’s just theories in my head, since i have basically no real experience of this. Sounds like the life you’ve lived/other ppl in the same community would be an interesting work of fiction. Aliens in like avengers movies are pretty much just typical society copy and pasted by with a skin change.

I would never be offended if someone came to me and said something along the lines of

I dig it. But in my life, both men and women would be offended if i said this to them haha. But i’ll ponder on this for a while and see if i can come up with a modification i could use.

Sharing thoughts about your feelings - the wants and needs, and the troubles you’re experiencing is generally speaking not a very cishetman thing to do and can help to show the vulnerability and desire to connect with another.

It’s genuinely a risky approach to do this, bc it’s not uncommon to be called a pussy (or similar) for sharing the vulnerabilities. Last happened to me 2 weeks ago. Though it was a (likely) cishetWoman, but she seems pretty conservative, so got black swaned there. But yeah, if i can correctly read a person isn’t gonna be offended by ‘i can feel pain’, then it’s probably helpful.

Also, you blog about this kind of thing anywhere? I wanna read more about the world you’ve live lol

It might help to explicitly seek out queer friend groups as they tend to be much more okay with and display this kind of affectionate behavior more often.

Yeah i have noticed this! One gay male acquintance would say uhh compliments / excessively nice statements to me (read: strange to hetero culture over here) I didn’t really know what was going on and just assumed the guy thought i was good looking or smthg but i didn’t mind since he wasn’t sleezy about it.

You could ask your friends if its okay to cuddle.

Similarly, 2 bi acquintances said they’d cuddle naked and shower and stuff and I had absolutely 0 idea what they were going on about, bc apparently they weren’t interested in the other and that 404 errorred me so probably just nodded my head and maybe threw out an active listening statement. Personally, that’d be way to much for me circa 2022.

Female friends did wayyy more affectionate stuff with each other then us lads. I always felt it was lame af of us lads. Like my exgf would dance with a male friend’s gf, leaving us with, uhh, nothing to do for like a few mins. When the gfs would initiate dancing with each other, i’d sorta look over at the dude and try to feel out if he wanted to dance together or something, but nada.

I regularly ask people if I can lay my head down in their lap, because I enjoy that particular dynamic.

Wow crazy, this would have Never had crossed my mind! What gender and sexuality are you if you don’t mind me asking? I’m cishetman.

I’ve noticed with a few males i suspected were gay that they’d be less friendly with het males then women. I figured they were concerned i’m douchbag or had worse experiences with het men so i didn’t mind much. But doesn’t exactly make it easy for me to talk to them.

Now that i’m a poor adult, i don’t even know how to meet people my age outside of like work. Which is largely due to poverty and my time away from work is spent trying to save money to afford rent. Ex having to walk everywhere takes a while. (Okay, i do know how to meet people… I mett some cool people now and then but very rarely get a chance to follow up on it)

Understanding a problem isn’t always enough to solve it though, as i found out.

Can I ask you to share your story and findings?

Have you considered seeking these kinds of behavior out from people whom you are not dating?

Yeah I’m open to that. But not sure where to begin with that that isn’t what I’m already doing

Interesting story the other day, a male and female friend did something independently that I found cute. I didn’t tell either of them that it’s cute. For the male - didn’t want to offend him by saying X was cute. For the female, didn’t want her to think I’m hitting on her.

A few years ago I offended a male friend by saying something along those lines.

Honestly, feel slightly bad to have to check my speech and I def didn’t check myself with the ex. I could try talking with these friends about this but uhh I don’t know how to bring it up, specifically around the male.

Write down the specific things you miss, and then ask yourself whether you’d miss any person who did those things or had those traits.

I knew I had no standards before but writing them out really emphasizes that feeling. I got: 1. just the company of having someone around even if we’re not talking, 2. ample eye contact, 3. things like holding hands or even just sitting shoulder to shoulder.

I’m het dude and have been having a a good time with dudes, which I guess is because it’s pretty easy to have 1 and 2 met.

Thinking about it, I think I’ve had better friendships with women. With men, I suspect some degree of machoism might make them do stuff like less eye contact? Which might explain my findings.

Are you thinking more about the person, or the idealized form you associate with the context that person had in your life?

Is much more along my lines

my study has been on the dialectics of relationships, not so much on how to think about them after

You study relationships?

idea of the person

Hey you actually noticed this too! In general, a lot of people love their idea of person the rather than the real person. Which i’ve been wondering about a lot lately. Any musing on how to tell if you’re in love with your perception of a person rather than the actual person?

When do you miss your ex?
Me - when I'm lonely.

I have head cannon that says we have some innate anti-incest genes in us that make people we’re related to less attractive to avoid inbreeding problems.

But yeah you can easily reply and talk about cousins, since we’re not that related to them.

How about if i editted the title to say “If 2 people who are more distantly related than 2nd cousins spend enough quality time together, do romantic feeling develop 95% of time?”

If 2 people spend enough quality time together, do romantic feeling always develop?
Assuming both or at least one of of them has a correspond sexuality/gender/etc that works with the other

How to buy a cheap new phone?
cross-posted from: https://lemmy.ml/post/310837 > All the guides I've seen are like "check out this budget phone for $350, it has five cameras" > > I only need one camera and it just has to be good enough to take pictures of documents while still being readable. > > Android 12 > > Like 16gb storage minimum. 2gb ram minimum. > > Most phones seem to be way over those specs knocking up price. A bunch that r more affordable don't go up to Android 12. I assume Android 12 is important so I don't get hacked when I'm trying to do banking on my phone on unsecured public Wi-Fi (which is where I do all my banking :( )

Anyone with knee pain use a bicycle? Any protips?
cross-posted from: https://lemmy.ml/post/301137 > if it goes well i could try to use it when there is snow on the ground - also no idea about that.

From https://lemmy.ml/post/297438

Why a lot of people don't care about the fediverse
cross-posted from: https://lemmy.ml/post/268746 > For poor people (ex lumenproletariat, but incl anyone struggling, which incls some middleclass 'big spenders') hard to give a hoot about privacy when like the bottom 2 rungs of maslow's hierarchy of needs are lacking. > > I personally bumped into digital privacy/the fediverse somewhat randomly when covid lockdowns were happening. Always sorta had an innate concept of privacy compared to some people though.

Why a lot of people don't care about privacy
For poor people (ex lumenproletariat, but incl anyone struggling, which incls some middleclass 'big spenders') hard to give a hoot about privacy when like the bottom 2 rungs of maslow's hierarchy of needs are lacking. I personally bumped into digital privacy/the fediverse somewhat randomly when covid lockdowns were happening. Always sorta had an innate concept of privacy compared to some people though.

Anyone else have actual conversations with homeless/poverty stricken individuals?
A lad told me today that he'll make a facebook account just to connect with me, gave me the address of the place he's couch surfing at and told me to come over anytime. He said "because you treat me like a human." 😢 I've gotten in trouble at a few jobs for talking with poor people rather than just shuffling them through. It helps that I have to walk through the hood frequently.

Anyone have any interesting stories/experiences with undocumented immigration?
edit: Anyone have any interesting stories/experiences with undocumented immigration/illegal immigration? Post does not apply to people who are legally refugees.

Got a 'good' seasonal job in the boonies but can't get there without buying a car. Advice?
cross-posted from: https://lemmy.ml/post/220614 I've posted around my local facebook groups for carpooling options/ride sharing/ride sharing/renting. Combined with the immense cost of paying some one submarket rates (less than taxi/uber) to bring me to the job and back, i'd only be taking home slightly more than minimum wage. Can I theoretically buy a car for like 3 months then like sell it at not too much of a loss? I'm in a bad state right now financially and don't have another job lined up. This seasonal job will hopefully help me get a better physical labor job like becoming a carpenter or like plumber. My boss and a few other ~~(capitalists)~~ people tell me that buying a car is a good investment and is like guaranteed to increase income... I guess if I did manage to become like an carpenter or whatever, then i'd need a car to bring all my tool stuff around town?