in my rural part of the u.s., the telco only sells dsl to a max of 10 mbps (and as slow as 384kbps if you’re at the end of the signal’s reach–at which point they also charge you more for the shit-tier speeds)… even if you’re literally next door to their central office… and even if they don’t have fiber down your street (which is their reasoning for the artificial limit–to push people towards fiber so they can pull the copper).

televisions of the near future when you first turn them on: “Internet connection and account required to complete initial product set up.”

i remember “playing” typer shark a long time ago. i think it still exists somewhere today.

i suck with the number row, too, because i was ill and in the hospital during that part of the term i took a typing class during high school. text i can do at ~ 100wpm and i’m a monster on 10-key, standard or inverted. while i am getting better in the decades since, the number row and the symbols on it still slow me down.

… which, in firefox, is either off by default or can be switched off.

some states do not have front plates.

I don’t even piss standing up anymore

the correct solution.

it could be worse.

i have my boss’s old one here that’s pretty much only used for testing mobile web and for its camera. i use a ‘dumb’ phone, and its camera doesn’t work (was crap-tier anyway when it did). i think it has 10 on it. it doesn’t leave the office, doesn’t get used that much, and has no google account linked to it anymore since it was totally reset when it was replaced earlier in the year… the inability to use google play to install a few apps reduces its usefulness. i got f-droid on it but not everything is available from it.

if that’s all you need it to do: browser, kitra, libreoffice and not much else… any mainstream distribution will work.

fedora’s ‘atomic’ distributions tick your boxes. minimal terminal exposure, hard to break, and infrequent demands of user password.

silverblue (gnome) or kinoite (kde). kde is a traditional desktop experience, but gnome would be excellent for your rather basic set-up.

pictures are taken by sorting machines of every piece of mail that goes through usps. that data is retained by the usps for a period of time, and is open to ‘law enforcement’ on request; and who knows what really happens to that data when the usps doesn’t want to hold it any longer.

rotisserie chickens are bred for that purpose and their lives are cut short to meet the cost and weight targets of the largest customers (walmart, etc), which means the facilities can produce ‘more’ in the same amount of time than roasters. they cost $6-10 here and $5-6 on sale (higher $ is at the regional convenience store chain, lower is wm), and i can frequently find ‘old’ ones in the cooler at wm marked down to $2 (yea, just two bucks each).

roasters are larger, priced by weight, and usually cost more (per bird) than rotisserie chicken. here, they’re $10-12 at wm, $15 and up at the ‘local’ grocery store. they’re rarely on sale.

and some are, apparently, obscure af:

“an issue with decoding LucasArts Smush codec, specifically the first 10-20 frames of Rebel Assault 2, a game from 1995.”

not shown: the small hose that ‘naturally’ refills the jacket.

every shit-tier chore ever conceived, and every task on every ‘honey do’ list ever made, would be completed. every day. on schedule. and without fail.

and the ‘game’ forces you to drop half your carried inventory as well as whatever was equipped in either hand when you do try to get back up.

if i had to provide a pc for work at home, it’d be a separate machine used exclusively for that, and isolated on its own lan.

and by ‘illegals’ they mean ‘brown people’ (regardless of origin or nationality or legal status to work here).

linux mint’s “installers” can boot into a live environment.

office back in the 9x days you could just use all 1’s.