I cannot tell you how many times I’ve made a noise on the toilet and been so embarrassed that I actually end up waiting for anyone who heard it to leave, just so I can stay anonymous
I don’t think there will be anyone who objects to this. There is nothing in a bathroom worth listening to. Nobody socializes in a bathroom. It’s as quiet as a library, and any bodily noise completely gives you away
Please just add background music to bathrooms. Even with quiet background music, you could at least strategically defecate to the tempo to make it sound like it’s part of the song
I hate public bathrooms, please make them bearable
🎵Push it! Unh. Push it real good!🎵
Pump Up the jam, pump it up… well. Maybe a different one.
Or in taco bell, Push it! It’s a beast called fire!
🎵 YAAAA YA PUSH IT!! 🎶
“Under Pressure” doo doo dododo doo
I’ve been to a public bathroom where they had soothing nature sounds as background “music”. Basically a good idea, but it was WAY TOO LOUD.
I comment loudly on my own noises, and everybody else’s.
I was at a bar once, not a busy place. Had to pee. I’m at the urinal doing my thing, blow a little toot.
Some big guy on the can backing out a hog says “gesundheit”. The audacity that I’m somehow the problem in here.
Still mad because it was hilarious and I didn’t think of it first.
Your supposed to be watching YouTube with the volume cranked really loud while dropping a deuce in public.
Watch videos of fart sounds. Paul flart.
Blendin
In Ancient Rome, public loos were holes in large plates of marble, everybody just sat (shat?) next to one another, there were no cubicles or walls. People conversed happily about business and family, squeezing and a huffing and a puffing. I always have to think about that, as I let go loud trumps and farts or liquid gas - shamelessly- in a public toilet. Lay back and enjoy! Taking a good crap is an integral part of human life; be proud of your achievement.
Guys from my high School went to the restroom together and shat together. The restroom had 20 toilets or something and they would talk together as the Romans did.
If one of them could make a poop so long it touched the water before slipping the butt (my English is really challenged here, haha. No idea if that sentence made any sense) they would shout “touchdown!” and he would the king of poop for that day.
Are you from a Nordic country perhaps? They are all Badass. I once visited communist Bulgaria. Toilets next to the highway consisted of a circular gutter with a pole in the middle. Patrons would jointly drop their pants, crouch down, hold the pole and aim your buttocks at the gutter. Enough place for 4-5 guys; but we didn’t converse much, due to the heavy diet, everybody was concentrating and had red faces from the effort. No need for background music when you grunt.
Yes, I’m from Denmark, but I didn’t know we known as badasses, haha.
A Dane knows no shame, only pain.
When I hear someone make noises in a bathroom stall, I (unwillingly) get vivid imagery of their sphincters moving as air or feces comes out
I have no idea if my noises will make other people imagine mine or not
I’m just private when it comes to that stuff. I don’t really enjoy… “existing,” to other people, whenever I defecate
You would not fare well spending a weekend in the county jail.
A county jail isn’t made to be “fared well” in in the first place.
Only begins to explain everything wrong with the prison system. Everything is designed to make it as cheap and profitable as possible
True, wasn’t trying to make light of that :)
When I go to the bathroom I expect a moment of peace (outside of expected ambient noises) and having a soundtrack to my piss is not my idea of that but to each their own.
If anyone has a problem with other humans making toilet noises in a toilet there’s something wrong with that person.
Guy who lives in a weird town where every single hotel/apartment wall is thin enough to hear people have sex: We should really have thicker walls so no one can hear me or others have intimacy
You if you lived there:
If anyone has a problem with other humans making bed noises in a bedroom there’s something wrong with that person
That’s how it sounds
I was actually making the comment in defense of/intending to reassure you lol but I can see how it came across otherwise, and I should have phrased it better.
Also: thicker walls do not make extra noise the way music does? As an autistic person who is highly sensitive to noise overload I don’t see how that would be a reasonable equivalent.
Bathroom stall walls should be thicker/go all the way to the floor (if you’re also in the US - we’re frickin uncivilized), and with that I could fully agree :) /gen /pos
Actually I like your thicker stall wall idea better, because I’m also autistic! I don’t have sensitivity to music, but car horns and alarms genuinely make my shoulders touch my neck at lightning speed. Being only medium far away from fireworks is the worst too, I fucking hate fireworks
I don’t even want bathroom stalls, I just want separate toilet rooms. Like, just make them out of bricks and add real doors
just so I can stay anonymous
Do you normally feel a need to introduce yourself to everyone with whom you share a bathroom briefly?
Every time I walk into a bathroom, I do a meet and greet with all the other women there. We have little ice breakers, such as names, zodiac signs, bristol stool scale number, and food that brought us here!
The last time I used the bathroom, I said “hey, I’m Tanis, not sure what my sign is, I think I’m about to poop a four on the scale, and I’m here because that chicken fried steak is about to push out last night’s burrito, lovely to meet you all.”
It’s part of the mandatory genital inspection.
No but people will see me. They aren’t blind
If people have to see me walk out of a bathroom stall, I’d rather they not have heard my noises
Yeah but no one will know your name. You remain anonymous, so does it matter?
Work bathrooms are one grey area though.
I do go to a work bathroom. That’s actually what forced me to overstay my 15 minute break by a few minutes and subsequently inspired my post
Yeah that makes some sense, although people can usually tell who’s in the stall anyway.
I remember going into a public bathroom on a field trip during my exchange semester in Korea, that started blasting classical music on full volume the second you enter it and it gave me a jumpscare lol. Otherwise was pretty pleasant though.
How was the scare, did you poop without delay, or did it crawl back up?
Some playlists are more suitable than others for this purpose.
~baby shark~ on repeat…
^ Hater of the Year right here.
Fuck yeah. Let it be Ministry - The Land of Rape and Honey on loop.
Carnivore - Inner Conflict I’m rotting inside, rotting inside I’m disgusted with myself I’m in hell, I’m in hell, I’m in hell
I’d vote for The Fart Song by Toilet Bowl Cleaners, but to each their own.
Nah. Jesus built my hotrod.
Japanese Toilets Play Music So You Don’t Embarrass Yourself
TL;DR
The Otohime is a wall-mounted speaker, launched by TOTO in 1988, that plays roughly 25 seconds of running-water sound to mask the noise of using the toilet. It is named after a dragon princess, replaced a wasteful habit of repeat-flushing that cost the country 2.7 million tonnes of water a year, saves around 6 litres per use, masks sound up to 45 dB, and is now installed in roughly 80% of Japanese women’s public restrooms. It is also, depending on who you ask, either a model of considerate design or a small monument to gendered shame. Possibly both.
I have traveled there, though I never needed to use the music because there are far less public bathrooms there to begin with!
The bidet is also a huge plus that I would like to add as another thing that we filthy Americans desperately need
There may be fewer separate “public bathroom” buildings but pretty much any konbini has a (perfectly maintained) bathroom available to customers.
The bidet is also a huge plus
💯💯💯
I recall my younger brother (perhaps 7 yrs old at the time) singing “Hey, hey, we’re the Monkees…” whilst crunching one out, so…
100%. I don’t know how many times I’ve simply been UNABLE to finish my business because of the shame. Obviously there is more to my case than “simple” poop sound shame (PTSD or whatever, who knows), but still. I’m with you.
Let’s do Dimmu Borgir.
Just follow up the sound with yelling “Holy fuck! What the fuck is THAT?” to make them feel on the edge.
